I need to say something plainly, because I think it matters: I'm not going to dress up my work in whatever language happens to be trending this year. I'm not going to perform allegiance to any political agenda to prove I belong in this space. I'm a neurodivergent therapist, and my work is about humans - not ideology.

I've spent my whole life masking. Contorting myself into whatever shape made other people comfortable. Learning the "right" words, the "right" performance, the "right" way to present so I'd be accepted. My diagnosis at 53 was the moment I finally stopped doing that. I am not going back to performing for anyone - not for neurotypical society, and not for any political camp either, no matter how well-intentioned or trendy it claims to be.

So here's where I stand: I work with humans. All of us, regardless of how we identify, what we believe, where we come from, or what boxes we do or don't tick. I'm not interested in checking whether someone's language matches this month's approved vocabulary before I decide they're worth supporting. That's not care. That's gatekeeping with better branding.

What I am interested in is authenticity. Lived experience. The actual human sitting in front of me, in all their messy, complicated, unmasked reality. If you're late-diagnosed and trying to figure out who you actually are underneath decades of performance, I don't care what your politics are. I care that you're a person trying to come home to yourself, and I know exactly what that feels like.

I built this practice on my own lived truth, not on a script handed to me by whichever movement currently has the loudest megaphone. That means some people will find me refreshingly direct. Others might find me difficult to categorise. Good. I stopped trying to be easily categorised the day I got my diagnosis.

If you're looking for a therapist who filters every sentence through political correctness before she says it, I'm probably not your best fit. If you're looking for someone real, someone who has actually lived the unmasking process she talks about, and who will meet you as a whole human being rather than a demographic - I'm here.

No agenda. No performance. Just me, unapologetically.

Spoon Theory changed how so many of us talk about energy and capacity. It gave language to something chronic illness and disability communities always felt but rarely had words for - that energy is finite, and every task costs something, even the ones that look small from the outside.

But living in my own AuDHD skin since my diagnosis, I realised spoon theory alone wasn't capturing my full experience. There's a second currency running alongside energy for those of us who are both autistic and ADHD - dopamine. And these two currencies don't always move together.

So I developed the Spoons & Sparks Matrix - a tool that maps energy (spoons) and dopamine (sparks) at the same time, rather than treating energy as the only variable.

What it identifies:

The matrix maps four states:

Flow - high spoons, high sparks. Energy and interest are aligned. This is when things feel sustainable and good.

Stalled - high spoons, low sparks. The energy is there, but nothing sparks it into action. This isn't laziness - it's executive function struggling to initiate without a dopamine hook.

Overdraft - low spoons, high sparks. This is the state I see most often in AuDHD clients, and the one that matters most. Interest is so strong it completely overrides the body's depletion signals. You don't feel the crash coming because the dopamine is masking the exhaustion, right up until it isn't.

Shutdown - low spoons, low sparks. Both currencies are empty. This is the body and brain both asking to stop.

What it helps with:

Once you can name which state you're in, you can respond to it differently. Someone in Stalled doesn't need to force willpower - they need a dopamine hook, novelty, or body doubling. Someone in Overdraft needs to recognise the pattern before it becomes Shutdown, because by the time exhaustion is finally felt, the damage is often already done.

This is why "just rest when you're tired" rarely works for AuDHD brains. When we're deep in hyperfocus, we may not feel tired even when our spoons are critically low. The crash feels sudden. It rarely is.

The Spoons & Sparks Matrix is now part of The Facets Programme, used in session to build genuine self-awareness around this pattern - not to eliminate it, but to help you make informed choices instead of unconscious ones.

If this resonates with how your own brain works, I'd love to explore it with you.

Finding Your Tribe: Why Neurodivergent Community Matters.

As a newly diagnosed AuDHD woman going through the journey of perimenopause, one thing I learned very quickly: look for like-minded people, find your tribe!

It is so common to hear people - and I say mainly neurotypical people - saying things like: "So why now? How is knowing this going to help you?", "Everybody is on the spectrum", "I know an autistic/ADHD/dyslexic person and you are nothing like them."

Hmmmm….

Look, I'm going to be straight with you. If you're looking for someone who's going to tell you that your ADHD is a "superpower" or that autism just makes you "think differently," you've come to the wrong place.